Understanding Love
by ScullyBones
Summary: After a extremely long hiatus, I am going to take a stab at the 100Th episode : There may be a lot of stories out there about this one episode but for me there are never enough Bones stories!


After a extremely long hiatus, I am going to take a stab at the 100Th episode :) There may be a lot of stories out there about this one episode but for me there are never enough Bones stories!

I apologize if this is a little rough to read, I have no beta and no one to review this before I post it. And honestly its an idea I have been chewing on ever since the 100Th episode and I figured if I didn't write and get it out today, I wouldn't do it at all.

No Bones doesn't belong to me....(although secretly its wants to be!)

Understanding Love~

My days had been dragging into each other, one after another. Limbo had never seemed to be overwhelming before but I had spent almost every minute there for the past week and I had only been able to identify two remains, who were related.

Booth had come by only a handful of times to tell me about his case he was working on for the bureau without me, all of the evidence he said had been collected before he got the case, so all was needed was his exceptional detective skills, his words not mine. He hadn't seem surprised though when two days after "that day" a case came up that wouldn't involve the help of his squints. I knew he needed the space and I planned on giving him as much as possible. The sooner he moved on and got over me the sooner I could with him, and there in lye my greatest problem, getting over Booth. No one in my life had ever even come close to breaking down my walls as Booth has. Some had tried but failed miserably, even my family was kept at a great distance. Temperance Brennan was a rational, logical and independent individual who relied on no one, or so I had thought. Without Booth I rarely ate anymore, my appetite had almost ceased to exist and the only sleep I was getting was when I fell asleep at my desk or fell over onto the platform in Limbo. Most of my clothes had moved into the coat closet in my office but for the most part none of that concerned me. I had lived that way for years before Booth and had survived just fine. No what was bothering me so much was this sick feeling I had through out my whole body. I feel nauseous all the time, when I sleep I wake up more exhausted than I was before and although I will never admit this to anyone, my heart hurt. The ache I felt was like nothing I have experienced before. Of course it wasn't possible for a organ to hurt unless something was physically wrong and when I had seen the doctor (just in case) his first words had been "Nothing is physically wrong with you..." I had immediately gotten up and headed back to work. The pain would go away, it had to and even if I didn't know why it was there I knew eventually it would go away.

Angela had made attempt after attempt to coax me out of the Jeffersonian, not one had been successful. I had already caused so much pain to one person. I couldn't bear telling Angela after all this time she was right and that I said no, she would be hurt to and possibly angry. I needed her to be there when Booth moved on and then she could leave to. Yes I had managed to keep everyone at there rightful distance, or so I had thought.

Hodgins came through the door carrying what looked to be a cup of tea. He was walking slowly towards me, I wasn't sure whether he was afraid to approach or if he was waiting for me to acknowledge his presence. I tried to appear even more engrossed in the tibia I had been looking at for the last hour. Maybe he was down here for Wendell or Mr. Nigel Murray or whichever one of my interns had rotated in this week.

He placed the glass right in front of me.

"eh hem"

.....

He shifted his feet

"Dr. Hodgins?"

I still hadn't lifted my head up and I pushed aside the tea so I could continue pretending to work.

"Temperance"

My eyes slowly lifted to meet his. Not once in all of the years I had known him, had he ever called me by my first name. Even when we were buried alive and seconds before we attempted to blow the airbag up and said our goodbyes we still were professionals.

"Jack?"

"Can I say something"

"You just did"

My joke fell short but he still tried to crack a smile

"I just wanted to say...I miss you and when your ready, no matter how long that takes, I will still be here...we will all still be here"

He placed a rubber band where the tea had been and walked quietly out of the room. It wasn't until my jaw started to hurt that I realized my mouth was hanging open. As soon as I started to close it I could feel the tears coming and for the first time since "that day" I cried. The hardest cry I could remember having. The tears just kept coming and when my nose stuffed up and my face started to feel feverish I slid to the floor, blowing my nose on any material I was wearing. I sat there crying till I was sure there was no more liquid my body I could disperse without becoming extremely dehydrated. Surprisingly though I felt better. I was more tired than I could have imagined but the ache in my heart dulled for just a couple of seconds and that was enough. I pulled the rubber band down and placed it on my left wrist and tried to drink as much cold tea as I could get down. When I knew my face was no longer flushed I got up and headed for my office. Hodgins must have waited till everyone had left before visiting me, only the security was left and he had settled into his desk to watch his nightly shows. Only the security lights were on and I tried to grab as much clothes as I could see from my closet before sneaking out the back exit.

My apartment looked deserted when I finally walked through the door, the trip that normally took ten minutes took almost twice the time in my state and I sighed against my closed door as I remembered it was Friday and I had two days to regroup. It was time to rethink my actions, all of my actions.

As always, anything and everything you have to say is appreciated :) Reviews of all kinds are always welcome!


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